Dear Jeauni 06: Do I Give Up on Love?
How I lost a $50,000 Dior hat & why age increases your value
Q. Dear fashion icon Jeauni, I've been struggling to find love since I was very young. I've always believed that you should know who you are first before seeking love, but I'm confused—I don't know who I am. I'm feeling the pressure to find someone as I'm getting older (I'm 25, which feels like the retiring age for gays), and I feel the pressure to find someone because I feel that my body is going to waste. Should I give up on love? They say love finds you when you're not looking, but I don't know how to stop searching.
Dear twiddling thumbs, let me tell you a story involving my stupidity and a relic from Dior's FW2000 Fly Girl collection—a sample Newspaper print hat adorned with a colossal diamanté CD (they were never put into production so it was likely the only one). Imagine it: languishing on eBay for what felt like eons, a tantalizing temptation priced at only $500. I pondered, I debated—was it truly my style? Not really. Alas, the hat was worn, weathered, my wallet was recovering from a recent job loss, and my credit card was knocking on death’s door. Stuck in this limbo place, I made the mistake of leaving one major player off the table: its rarity. This gem sported theeee ICONIC Galliano-penned Newspaper print—a print immortalized by Carrie on Sex & The City in that HOT ASS DRESS (currently listed for a cool $64,000). So what was I thinking by skipping over it for the sake of not charging my already cinched credit card?
Trick question, I wasn’t thinking at all! And when it finally sold, I was gutted because it was a piece of history and, as a collector, I can’t believe I let it slip by. But nothing prepared me for its resurrection on 1stDibs, now priced at a jaw-dropping $50,000! I wasn't just bereaved; I'd been hunted, slain, skinned, and fashioned into an exotic handbag smuggled by Nancy Gonzalez herself. My death was literally this new seller’s BAG and she was standing completely in it by charging 100x what she bought it for. I loathed her and myself for it, haunted by the missed chance to possess this 24-year-old masterpiece.
But let this tale be a mirror to your own journey: Much like my fumble to realize how special that hat is, you are missing out on how rare of a treasure you are–one imbued with value beyond measure. Akin to the newspaper print, and just about every other Galliano for Dior piece, you are at your prime in this market and worth every damn penny. As time pumps on, you'll discover your worth ascending; understanding just how much someone is willing to give up to get close to you ($500 vs $50,000). But you can’t get there if you’re pigeonholing yourself to this harmful mindset of an “expiration date”; you're not a vintage find nearing obsolescence. Embrace the truth: you are deserving of love—today, tomorrow, always. Reject the notion that self-love must precede external affection; love is not contingent upon self-understanding. It's a charming journey intertwined with self-discovery, a voyage of perpetual delight as you explore, evolve, and grow in age. The more life you live, the more you will have to understand. Once you accept this as truth, you will give yourself the permission to be loved by someone. And sometimes love is what finally brings you to your highest self and there is nothing wrong with that – trust me, I know it firsthand.
So, should you surrender hope or stow away your dreams of love? NO, Queen! However, do try to be easier on yourself and release the constraints of time; love is not a fleeting auction with competing bidders. You possess as much time as you do life, each moment ripe with the promise of love's arrival. Embrace patience, trust in the abundance of romance, and remain open to love’s embrace. The more you believe in it, the more you will experience it – it can happen again, again, and again. And as for me, I'll cling to the hope of another once-in-a-lifetime Dior acquisition. When that day arrives, let's rendezvous and share a pot of tea…you bring your great love and I’ll bring…my HAT!
Cue the music~*
With Love,
Jeauni Cassanova
Oh I felt this one so hard. I had a similar eBay fumble. I think about it every day and it’s been almost 8 years.